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Hi DK
I can tell, by your post, you are an intelligent person. You describe how you are feeling so articulately. What you have described is, indeed, what most of us understand very well....mental illness. Mental illness is absolutely no different to any other illness and nothing to be ashamed of. No more that a diabetic should be ashamed of having diabetes. But, I must stress, you cannot 'fix' this. You need professional help, just as does a diabetic. I suggest you find professional help from where ever you can get it. You are a person, and as such, have value. You deserve a life free from mental illness. Believe me, this is achievable. Please get help...you deserve the very best
I care
OOTB XXXX

Written by outoftheblue, Friday, 12 March 2010 21:27

sorry here is some background info.

I am 20/m/uni student.

I have had a mental breakdown 24 hours ago. This morning I tried to kill my self. I am on avanza but not working. I am 100% isolated from everyone, but I did speak to my friend Teagan today and told her everything. She said I have been acting werid these past couple of weeks and everyone has been concerned about me. Don't live at home. Live on-campus. Dad has skitzophina. I tend to have a very positive outlook on life most of the time. I have other medical issues with are eating at me. I do have depression.

So I told myself, right, im just going to go to bed and sleep. But now the lights are on, I do not want to even try and sleep anymore and it just gets scary.

Written by dkaus, Friday, 12 March 2010 21:28

Hello again Dk
I am sending you every ounce of love i have. You are not isolated...i am here!! What can I do to help?
Love
OOTB

Written by outoftheblue, Friday, 12 March 2010 21:36

Thanks Outoftheblue.

Yeh I know its in my head.

I went and also spoke to my lecturer today (I didnt tell him anything about my health, except that I am going though a bad time and am concerned about my work ethic at the moment as I can not focus/be motiviated.)

I will still try my best in that important subject when I can. Its important to keep the man who holds my final grades, of the most important subject of my degree to be informed so I don't appear slack.

I did not do an embrassing breakdown or anything in his office.

Written by dkaus, Friday, 12 March 2010 21:37

I will be in chat if you want to talk
OOTB

Written by outoftheblue, Friday, 12 March 2010 21:40

I umm...feel very sick. I have trouble eating. I am twiching. I am not as outgoing/friendly as I usually am. I always feel alone and isolated, but last 24 its all I feel as well as being dirty.

I have had episodes like this before. The local hospital, Headspace and Psycologists have all seen me. All they did was put me on avanza. Say bye, bye and not support me as I seemed I got happier.


I am crashing right now. I am having a mental breakdown. It happens every couple of months. I am dealing with being crazy, having Marfan Syndrome, depression, stressful university situation, living by myself, financial problems, having social problems with my existing friends and having a relationship problem with the girl I love who does not love me back. Of course I am havng a breakdown.

Written by dkaus, Friday, 12 March 2010 21:55

My dear dkaus
When mentally ill, we do not think rationally!! If you are wondering if life is worth living (and I'm sure you are).....let me reassure you ...yes it is!! I don't know you personally, but from my interaction with you I DO know you are a good person...Moreover, I DO know you are an intelligent person... You deserve to live life in the way it was meant to be,.,,ie periods when we are thankful and grateful for the precious gift of life....and periods of pain, depression and suffering. This is the nature of existence... the challenge is to ride the waves of pain, accept the ocean, and patiently wait until the storm passes and in the mean time get all the support we can...keep going...DK!!
I care
OOTB

Written by outoftheblue, Friday, 12 March 2010 23:32

see the uni counselor. its free. tell them its urgent and hopefully they'll give you an early appointment. there is help out there. you need to reach out for it.

then go see your gp. if you dont have one, i suggest you go to uni health centre and find a good one. ask her to refer you to a psychiatrist that bulk bills and a psychologist.

if you cant do all that, ask you friend teagen to help you out. if she doens't, start with the uni counselor.

hope you get some help.

take care

wd

Written by WhiteDove, Saturday, 13 March 2010 12:30