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Dear Northrnbelle,

I don't really have advise for you, but it's important to keep your illness open to the people you trust. This doesn't need to be taken as a burden by your sister.
Maybe if that is something you are worried about it is better to talk to her by phone as you can answer any questions she might have straight away.
And, you might feel more at peace as you will be there to hear her reaction..instead of not knowing when she'd be receiving the letter and not knowing her reaction then when reading it.

Good luck!

Éowyn

Written by Éowyn, 14. Feb 2008 10:56 AM

Hi
I have thougtht about your problem and know it is not easy to tell people sometimes, even or especially family!
Maybe sending her some info on depression from doctor's office or the net and writing a letter to go with it may help. She may then see how widespread depression is in the general community and know a biot more about it. You could then add how it affects you personally. perhaps you could post the letter, so that it has to be signed for at the post office when received and you would know that it arrived the next day-check out details at post office. then you would know when to follow with a phone call and answer any questions she has and let her know that you are okay but would like her support.
Hope you can come up with your perfect solution
Love and support
Sue:)

Written by dontworrybehappy, 14. Feb 2008 01:02 PM

I think it'll be good if you can tell people you trust about your depression, you may be surprised at how supportive they would be. I think its good that you are wanting to tell your sister. I reckon probably best to give her a call for the reasons Eowyn mentioned.

Written by a-Leng, 14. Feb 2008 01:34 PM

I personally never told my family what was going on with me until it was painfully obvious (being locked up in a psych ward is a little hard to hide). I still don't like talking to people about it, because like you I don't want to burden my Mum. I have however found out that it is more of a burden for her to see me suffering and not know what I am thinking.

Since you live so far away from your sister, she probably doesn't have much idea of what's going on cause it is easier to hide, however I think that it may help you to tell her. There's a saying that goes something like 'a burden shared is a burden halved' - from what I've read it sounds like you could do with your burden being halved.

Written by babz, 14. Feb 2008 04:47 PM

NB

It is obvious that people think you should tell your sister but not to burden her but to help her understand your illness. I think it is a good idea. My sister I hope is going to see my psychiatrist for me because he won't see mum because she is questioning my treatment - the medications are killing me and he is keeping me on these meds longer than need be.

I think you should tell your sister as it will help you, help her understand your illness, way you act/react to things, what treatment you are on and for support if you need it - we all need that special person to support us through good times and bad times.

Go NB!!!

Studying1

Written by studying1, 14. Feb 2008 05:36 PM

Hi Northern Belle

It's a hard decision to make and only you can do it because it's your family and your relationships.

I kept my depression from my mother and sister for nearly 2 years. I thought I was doing a good job at it as I didn't see them often. I live in a different state. Our communication was via email & phone only. When I finally told them they were so pleased that I told them. They thought I was pushing them away and was keeping to myself. They thought our relationship had been damaged and they had lost me forever.
I was only trying to protect them as they have problems of there own but infact I was doing the opposite.
They have been a wonderful support to me since then and it is so good not to have to put on a cheerful voice if you feel like crap. Now they understand.

As far as the medication goes. I started new medication on 1 January and am just starting to feel a bit brighter now. I still have days when I am down and teary but they seem to be getting further apart.

I wish you all the best with your decision, take care of yourself......

Regards
Girlie

Written by girlie, 14. Feb 2008 06:18 PM

Your diary has prompted me to write something I've been meaning to write for some time. See my latest diary entry "Sharing my depression" for my thoughts and experiences.

Tom

Written by hounddog, 16. Feb 2008 08:03 AM