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words fail me...

A page in the diary "Meandering Thoughts"
Written by cateblack 7. Oct 2008 11:41 PM

I am home now... they kicked me out with a "you are discharged" and i am not sure i know what to say... i am humbled by the outpouring of support and care from the deppies... I have read some of the posts and have more to read... thank you for all the detective work... it is gratifying to know that we have so many clever and creative ppl so that if any of us go missing ... there are ways and means of getting in touch with someone to find out what has happened...

The pdocs said it is depression... they said it is stress... not sure that is what it is totally... today I find it hard to believe i thought and felt the way i did... I am still sad at times... and the thoughts of death come and go but i can manage them better now...

i am back on my meds...

I feel a little lost ... keep wondering how I will survive today... so this hour goes by and yes i made it... and so on to the next hour... and the one after that... that is how I will survive it... and i listen to the part of me that wants to live...

Knowing you guys are out there fighting too helps me...

from the bottom of my heart and soul... Thank you... and if I can do for any of you... just ask... if i can do it i will...

take care...

rgds
cate

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Comments from the community:

Cate

Glad you are home and back on your meds.

We all worked so hard and together to make sure you were ok because we were worried about you. No, if anyone goes missing the deppie network will find them.

Welcome back and I hope things are better for you.

Go Cate!!!

Mrs Studying1

Written by studying1, 7. Oct 2008 11:47 PM

Hey there cate.l am so glad you are alright. l hope you have someone to help get you through this, and you are not on your own.Please hun if you get like this again call the hospital straight away , a friend ,lifeline etc.Depression has such a hold on us and sometimes we think we are coping. But then it just takes over and we have no control..You maybe feeling a little lost because you are out of the hospital suuroundings might take a few days to adjust ...Keep up with your meds.... have a violet crumble for me.and watch some crappy ads on TV lol... Chin up hun you are the strong one ,,and you will get through this, it will just take a bit of time ...take care for know
rubee xxxxx
.

Written by Deleted_User, 7. Oct 2008 11:56 PM

Welcome back
Mmmwa
xxx

Written by Gyps, 8. Oct 2008 12:41 AM

I saw my psych today & told her of the weekends events. She was rather impressed with the detective work & the fact we found you.
I told her the symptoms you were experiencing & of your failed attempts and how you decided you wanted to go out with something more exotic!
Well you shoulda heard her laugh.
She said its definately exotic & certainly not something most people'd think of, especially given most dont even realise its poisonous!
Glad your home, Gus must be stoked to have you back
Take it easy.
xxx

Written by Gyps, 8. Oct 2008 12:49 AM

Hi Darl...so glad you are home & coping better. Please e-mail me anytime or text me...I am bloated & overweight at the moment. Cannot sleep at night...like a lot of us on Depnet. I have what they call 'Elephantitis' in both legs now...really hate my legs. Makes it hard to get around...Shhhh!!! stop complaining Nanna Val...could be worse!!!
I breed parrots, but use to breed Chinchilla & Himalayan persians, so we are both cat lovers.
Yes...Gyps is our DepNet detective...I am proud of her.
Love...Valerie x0x

Written by Deleted_User, 8. Oct 2008 03:39 AM

Cate

Please make a time to see your regular psych and tell him what happened over the weekend - don't leave it until the next appointment. This is quite urgent and he should be monitoring the change in your meds.

Hope you don't mind my contribution to find you but it was because we were worried about you.

Go Cate!!!

Mrs Studying1

Written by studying1, 8. Oct 2008 08:43 AM



Cate...........


Welcome back and I hope that you are feeling better. It was lovely the way the Deppies pulled together in looking for you. Just remember that you are loved by a lot of people and have a lot of friends here for you. So if you ever need help. just let us know.
Take care,
Lesley

Written by lesleyk, 8. Oct 2008 09:09 AM

I am so pleased you are back here, minute by minute hour by hour day by da Cate. Our life is made of moments, I hope you have some joy in moments soon,

Love Liz

Written by keller, 8. Oct 2008 12:53 PM

Hi Cate and welcome back,

So glad to hear from you and that you are okay. We all missed you. I have felt just like you and I am well on the way to recovery, so hang in there Cate, you will soon get past this too.

(((((hugs)))))

Love cheery1

Written by cherry1, 8. Oct 2008 02:19 PM

Hi Cate,

I too am very relieved that you are ok. You are very much loved and respected amongst us deppies, and I am sure that everyone here is glad to have you back.

Em

Written by spinner, 8. Oct 2008 03:44 PM

Cate,
Welcome home. So happy to hear you are going ok. It is a long bumpy road but you will get there. You have alot of people on here who care alot about you and will help you along the road as much as possible.
Take care and be kind to yourself
Lynne

Written by chookie67, 8. Oct 2008 05:06 PM

hey there! good to know you are safe!
take care
xxx
Amy

Written by Awoods, 8. Oct 2008 06:01 PM

Hello There Dear Cate,

How are you going??

I've been pretty worried about you and also VERY GREATFUL that you are back and okay.

I'm sorry you haven't been travelling too well lately and Ihope things pick up for you VERY soon.

You are a VERY special, friendly, genuine and precious person.

Don't lose hope.

Feel free to emailme anytime,

TAKE GOOD CARE Cate,

I'd love to hear from you

SusieWoozie

Written by Deleted_User, 8. Oct 2008 08:39 PM

Welcome home Cate, we're all so glad that you're OK. You've got the right attitude on how to get through - one hour at a time.

Love and hugs

Written by babz, 8. Oct 2008 09:08 PM

Welcome home Cate and are OK.

Written by smokinshar, 8. Oct 2008 10:09 PM

Welcome home Dear Cate

Take care

Love Dolly x

Written by dolly, 9. Oct 2008 12:01 PM

Hi cate, Just wanted to say hello and hope things are getting a little easier for you.Thinking of you ..take care
rubee xxx

Written by Deleted_User, 10. Oct 2008 11:11 AM