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Written by riles 31. Jan 2008 10:47 AM

I remember cuddling my baby, he meant everything to me, there is nothing like baby warmth and that distinctive baby smell. I loved caring for him, changing his nappy, feeding him and the daily routine all revolved around him. I would find oppertunities to get outside and go for a walk or just play in the backyard, enjoying all of his first experiences with him. Things have changed, now he is three, I have more time with my thoughts, he doesn't need me as much, isn't as conncted to me as he onces was. We have grown apart and I need to start being me, again, although, it seems like I have lost myself somewhere along the way, I used to have a strong sense of self, connected with work, career and being a wife, now I have gone from being a 24 hour around the clock mum, to not knowing what I am.... Not sure where to go from here. I still enjoy cuddles and being with Riles, but it is different now, not sure if it is just coming off the meds, or the differences that alway happen in different stages of life, who knows.

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Comments from the community:

Riles

It is as a result of the depression that things have changed for you and your family. Yes Riles has grown and is asserting his independence but you are also not a well person and need to accept you might need treatment if you are not already getting it. Go to your gp and discuss your options. I too went from a working person with the public service to a mental wreck because of the treatment I received at work - most unfair and not right.

Take Care.

Go Riles!!!

Studying1

Written by studying1, 31. Jan 2008 10:59 AM

Hi riles
I understand how u r feeling, it was once i got all my kids off to school that i started trying to work out what it was i wanted from life and looking deeper into who i am, u r so commited to that other little person for so long that u begin to lose urself, time to start taking care of u.
take care riles, hope we can catch each other for a chat again soon.

(((((((((((((riles))))))))))))

B1

Written by bananas, 31. Jan 2008 03:34 PM

Riles

I do not have a child as you do... but I do know about searching for my identity... you are more than a mother, a wife you are an individual with hopes and dreams and desires who is a mother and wife. You will one day go back to work... your Riles will go to school... but he will always be connected to you ... if you help keep the connection alive... he is independent and he is dependent... he still needs you... you still need him... but you also need to explore some of your hopes and dreams... find your passion... keep yourself alive with him to share your dreams... the medication will be affecting you... start small.. give yourself one small piece of joy a day... whether it is a kiss from your son your husband that was spontaneous... or maybe go to the park and listen to the laughter of your child as they play ... try something new... look up courses you might be interested in doing... it is hard... and might not work all the time... but it helps... i think... sometimes...

rgds
cate

Written by cateblack, 31. Jan 2008 11:39 PM