Hi Psyche here
A page in the diary "Steve the Diary"
Written by winterrain 3. Sep 2007 02:02 AM
Hi guys,
sorry to worry you - just needed to cut myself off from everything and anything I had done while Peter existed in my world until I was free and clear of him - which I am almost.
It still hurts that someone who proffessed to love me so greatly could do what he did, especially after he knew about my abusive past and promised he would never hurt me like that.
I still miss him...but I don't love him...he kind of scares me now.
C.O.D'ed everything I had that belonged to him, or he gave me, or reminded me of him to his parents house, along with copies on disk of every photo of us and video of the promise he made before he left, then wiped my computer. Also told his mum about the baby - I don't know if he'd told her, but I felt (at the time) like I owed her some explaination and apology for aborting her grandchild (who I still love even though it's father was an prick)
I've been having a rough time - many days spent crying for no reason, the end of a very important friendship.
I'm finally seeing a psychiatrist this week, so hopefully he'll be of help, doesn't seem to be medication centred so at least I know that unlike my last one he won't just increase my dose every time I feel worse :)
So hi everyone, how've you all been doing? not so good it looks like so BIG HUGS TO ALL - I've missed you lots.
A