a new ERA
A page in the diary ""
Written by zombieluv 18. Apr 2008 09:07 PM
finally sorted mental health plan out. the psych is away with her kids on holidays so some time after that ill see her. a slightly disconcerting detail i observed to day on the back of her card. this little dittie:
Empowerment
Resolution
Achievement
Start a new ERA in your life today!!!!!
whats that? that worries me. i hate that kind of speak. it makes me think of bandaids and positive attitudes that don't solve anything. i hate analogies and stuff. cant stand it. i think im just looking for excuses to hate therapy before i even start. what is wrong with me. i guess im just not getting my hopes up.
sleeping has become a full time job lately. i am asleep by 2 am, im back up at 5am till about 8am, then i go back to sleep for a few hours. i have had a headache for a month, and a severe toothache that i keep putting up with because im scared of the dentist. which is all so retarded because this toothache is ten times more painful than anything the dentist will do. what can i say i am irrational and i am living on painkillers so it seems not important to go to the dentist.
still im managing to have a life. i think i met someone. i have a crush anyway. which is totally new, this is the first time in years ive been interested in dating and its fun. i dont know why, i feel confident in that area though... i cant wait to share my life with someone so i suppose thats why. ive been so picky... and alone. but that doesn't mean im caving in.... i just think this person has a bit more depth than im used to. i feel challenged for a change.
moods have been okay though. i dont know, im so confused. maybe theres nothing wrong with me. i dont know. why do people have to say little comments to me. get a life. its all in your head. bleh. of course its all in my head....