Job and home
A page in the diary "A Day in the Life Of..."
Written by babz 2. Mar 2008 03:42 PM
I had my trial shift today - I got the job. Only had to stay for 20 minutes till she decided to hire me. I'm trying to force myself to be excited, but I seem to be immune to positive emotions. I am very anxious though - I have a lot on my plate what with Uni, DBT, skating and now a job. I hope I don't overdo it and undo the good work.
I am also stressed out about living arrangements - the concept of living alone is very scary. The longest I have ever been away from home (excluding hospital) was 3 weeks when I was in Africa, and I was hardly alone, and I didn't have a medical history as big as the white and yellow pages combined then.
My stepbrother is going on a school trip soon, so I asked my Mum if perhaps she could go and live at Richard's (stepdad's) house for the 3ish weeks that Greg (stepbrother) is gone to see how I cope on my own for an extended period. She and Richard are also going to Europe for a month in July, so I will have more of a trial then if I haven't already moved out. I think it is normal to be nervous about moving out, especially given my instability, but am craving independence. Before I got sick I was so strong and fiercely independent - I feel as if I had the rug pulled very brutally from under my feet, and I'm sick of being a basket case and relying on everyone else.