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childhood home

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Written by keller 9. Apr 2008 08:09 PM

I visited my childhood home on the weekend, just happened to be in the neighborhood and oh god it was hard. I have since thought a lot about this and have gone through the process of observing and describing emotions (a DBT thing). What I came up in regards to feelings were – Bitterness/Uneasiness but they still don’t quite get to the gut level feelings I had. Anyway the exercise is done now and I am hopeful that doing things such as this after the event will lead me to doing them as things happen. But there will be occasions for just being mindful that I am feeling something, and that I can describe it later when I have the time to think about it. I am also hoping that doing this will reduce my stress and agitation levels and hence my sleep may improve.

I am also wondering about why it is that I am so anxious (still) in coming to see my psychologist. I have spoken to a few other people (those in my group) and another friend as to what it is that makes it seem so easy for them to speak to counselors /clin psychs. Most of the people I spoke to said its like they have someone on their side, somewhere where it is easy to just be themselves. I wrestle with this I really do. I can see the gains I have made with her, and I can see the value in continuing, but this initial fear and trepidation I always feel when coming to see her does not seem to resolve. I am as exhausted spending an hour with her as I am spending a day in the DBT group!

I do not think it is an issue of trust, at least not as it was for the first six months or so. I actually think I would communicate if I was at risk or whatever. It’s not a question of dislike as I enjoy her company when we are off topic or winding up and I value her insight and skill in assisting me. I was just hoping that after all this time it would not feel quite so anxiety provoking. I don’t want it to be like visiting a friend but conversely I don’t want it to be like visiting a dentist either! Anyway I will ponder this during daylight hours over the next period of time.

I do notice I am loosening up in being able to speak more and this must be a good thing, I just hope I am not using story telling as a way to avoid talking about how I feel. This is something I have noticed in myself.

Oh well that’s about it


Take care

Liz

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Comments from the community:

Keller

Wow what a great achievement to go and revisit the old childhood home and to go through all the emotions, feelings you have done. I am glad you have got through it and am not guilting yourself about the house/what happened there.

With regards to the psychologist, it is a matter of rapport and their ability to help you and treat you like an equal and not them superior than you. I also find that the same for psychiatrists. They need to be open and honest with you and you can be open and honest with them. If you have been going for six months, things should be good but they may not be because you may not trust the psychologist. If things are not improving, perhaps you need to review seeing that psychologist and see someone else. I know it is a big change but you have to be comfortable and able to have a good rapport with anyone treating you and if you can't get that, then speak to the DBT therapist and tell them you would like a new psychologist, as this is an assumption, you are seeing the psychologist when you do your DBT session.

Go Keller!!!

Mrs Studying1

Written by studying1, 9. Apr 2008 08:42 PM

Hi Liz,
Sorry I didnt get to talk to you for long on the chat. Its been one of those days. I dont really want to leave my email address here coz its public, so I will give it to you privately next time we're chatting.

Written by survivor, 9. Apr 2008 10:49 PM

For me, with Psychologists, I feel very exposed and therefore vulnerable. Interestingly, I visited one of the orphanages I was in and I felt absolutely not a thing, which in itself didn't seem quite right...

Written by Deleted_User, 10. Apr 2008 08:58 AM

Liz...

your visits to your psychologist.... just an idea and you can dismiss it if you want... but maybe you experience some touchy topics with her and your mind remembers this and says hey we are going to see that woman.. and she makes me feel these feelings and I am not sure I want to feel those feelings.. so I will get nervous and anxious as i get there...

it seems you have been doing some tough work... DBT is huge... I am impressed... I can only remember some of it... I need to do a second course...

take care... and don't be hard on yourself about the psychologist...

rgds
cate

Written by cateblack, 10. Apr 2008 01:05 PM

heya beautiful,
I just added a couple of poems to my post "dear Doctor..." for you to read...

Hope your keeping well
mmmwa
xxx

Written by Gyps, 15. Apr 2008 07:59 PM