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I'm crashing fast & it scares me.All it takes is one weak moment

A page in the diary ".a pLc 4 miE haed..."
Written by JoanneC84 30. Oct 2007 11:37 PM

I thought I was doing so well.. I was ok,.I haven't been cutting,my moods haven't been too bad,I've been coping ok.. My anxiety is bad,but I've been managing..
And now,I'm just crashing into a heap so fast its frightening me...
Maybe I was just fooling myself...

I just don't know what to do..
Its been 16 weeks now since I last hurt myself..An achievement,yes ofcourse,but now,despite all that,I find myself fighting the urges again..Fearing that it will take one weak moment to throw it all away..Throw away all the hard work that I have put in...

I'm lost..
I'm spiralling..
I fear that I have lost control...

Jo

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Comments from the community:

Dear Jo
I too just crashed, it feels like something is going to swollow you up.Please don't give up.Fight it. I know that is hard. Just try thats all you can do is try.

Katrina

Written by Kat1, 31. Oct 2007 06:44 AM

I don't know if this will make sense. Sometimes when we are fighting somrthing we keep it way too close to us initially, then over time, slip back into it because it is still ever present, counting weeks, that sort of thing, keeps it close. One thing you might try is put a date on the calendar in the nearish future and give yourself permission to slip on that day if you really must.
Then forget about it. You might even find that day comes and goes and you were too busy to even notice. Or, you can move it forward again, and forget it again.
Just a strategy...

Written by Deleted_User, 31. Oct 2007 10:08 AM

Jo

Perhaps it is time to visit Stace and Tash to get a dose of happiness/caring/adult conversation.

I can relate to the cutting and 16 weeks is something you should be proud of. Well done and keep it up. Unlike me I can't fight the urges and am doing it daily.

Go Jo!!!!

Studying1

Written by studying1, 31. Oct 2007 05:19 PM

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