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Comments from the community:

JO,

good luck hun. We all have times where we step back because it all gets too much .... But now its only up babe :)

Written by kayce, 22. Sep 2008 08:08 PM

Jo.....I am so very sorry i haven't been here for you the past couple of months....have had some pretty bad urges of my own to deal with.....but that doesn't help you.

It doesn't matter what day it is....every day without you self harming is a huge bonus.....every single one.

I know what you are feeling going back to square one....with my drinking.....at least you have started at day one again...i can't even get that far so you are in a better position than me......and for that i am truly happy.

You don't have to be strong for us Jo...just for yourself...that's all that matters...and we are so very proud of you with whatever you achieve.

Please take care...and you know how to get hold of me if you need......and i am here for you...ok

Luv Nouse

Written by Nouse, 22. Sep 2008 09:34 PM

jo

sometimes it is a case of starting at the beginning again... and see if you can beat 14 months next time...

falling apart... not sure... dive deep into the emotions of hell... how can we feel the wounds of heart under the unbroken skin... cut the poison out...

take care

you have done well... be proud of what you have achieved... and do not worry about what is to come...

rgds
cate

Written by cateblack, 22. Sep 2008 09:37 PM

Hey Jo

One day when you weren't strong enough in 14 months... Congratulations on having been so strong the rest of the time, even when it was so hard.

The hard work hasn't been undone. You have just had one moment of weakness. Okay. So, you are human. You are not strong all the time. Just keep being as strong as you can and keep yourself safe as much as possible.

Love you

Jenny

Written by jennytmaher, 22. Sep 2008 10:53 PM

Hey JO take care there are people out there
who care about you.as do i, in some way i feel i know you.
Maybe when you climb out of this hell you are in at the moment .Because you are strong and can beat anything this world can throw at you
you will read these lyrics and they will mean more
than just words on paper.


I just got back from hell
And im standing here alive
I know it's really hard to tell
Don't know how I survived
But I cant say im doin great
But I think im doin well
The devil's gonna have to wait
Cause I just got back from hell

Well, I just got back from hell
And I guess to tell the truth
Well, I've been mad at everyone, including God and you
When you cant find no one to blame you just blame yourself
And I know I'll never be the same
I just got back from hell

Forgive me if i had any part
If i ever broke your heart in two
Forgive me for what i didn't know
For what i didnt say or do
And God, forgive me as well
Cause i just got back from hell

Well, i just got back from hell
And i need to make some plans
It's the last thing that i wanna do
But i'll do the best i can
I'm gonna learn to live again
But i think i'll sit a spell
Tell the world that i'm alive
And i just got back from hell

I cant say that i'm doin great
But i think im gettin well
Gonna let the world know im alive
And i just got back from hell
And i just got back from hell
I just got back from hell
Got back from hell
Regards Demons.

Written by Demons48, 22. Sep 2008 11:29 PM

Dear Jo,

I'm sorry that this past month has been so hard. Well done for keeping on with depnet and giving us the opportunity to hold you up when you can't hold yourself up.

I can identify with the disappointment that you feel. I have struggled with self-harm on and off for over 6 years now. There have been times when the "counter" (of no self-harm) has been good if it gets past 1, but then I've had periods when I've gone a year or more without giving into those urges. As Nouse said... every single day when we fight the urges is a bonus - you had 14 months of them!! (that's at least 427 bonus days you know... damn fine effort I'd say!).

Try not to feel like you have failed or let people (or yourself) down. No-one blames you for the position that you are in or what you are up against... we're behind you all the way... even if it had only been 14 days, 14 hours, 14 seconds, or even 14 years that you had resisted the urges, we'd still be encouraging you to keep going and believing in you all the way. You obviously have the resources to stop yourself from self-harm - I mean 14 months is a long time!! (and from experience I do not take that for granted and recognise the hard work that you have done to achieve this) I know that given the last month and the state of mind that you're in at the moment, that it's going to be harder to draw on those resources, but I know you have them, so I hope that you can draw them out from the depths.

Well done for restarting the counter. Don't put too much guilt and pressure on yourself though - recognise that you have a lot up against you at the moment and be easy on yourself.

Take care, and keep us updated.

xoxo

Written by Shozna, 23. Sep 2008 03:31 AM

I know you feel disappointed Jo. Its okay to fall back. Life isnt always about going up, sometimes we gotta go down to trully appreriate the up.

It doesnt matter what day it is - as nouse said. you have done well and i have faith, you wil continue doing well.

take care

wd

Written by WhiteDove, 24. Sep 2008 12:11 AM

Thinking of you jo jo.

It's hard when you take a step back. But, you've done so well...are doing so well. Remember, everything passes, as this difficult time will. You have everything it takes to get back on track, and when you're ready you will. The past is history. What matters now is the choices you make for your future...and you can take time to do that. Be gentle with yourself, and kind, and nurturing. Forgive yourself, and feel some peace, and then, when you're ready move on into the future.

It's a journey babe, not a destination.

Love Kimberly
xoxo

Written by newlife, 24. Sep 2008 02:05 AM

((Jo bee))

Written by bachremedy, 24. Sep 2008 12:12 PM