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Written by bluewave 13. Jul 2007 01:27 AM

Dear friends,

I work for a stock broking firm. I am the youngest and only female. In this man's world you make good friends and then when in a position that I am in you also meet some real arse holes.

I weigh 75kg and recently have just put on 15kg in past months. More recently men in this world have talkedd about me about my weight behind my back and to my face.

The subtle suggestions that I should go for the salad and not the steak. The up front comment that I have put on a lot of weight. The degrading comments to other woman as if thay are a piece of raw meat. Then me who is not a 'hot chick' I get the looks, sometimes none at all, sometimes at meeting I do not even get enough respect for a hand shake.

It makes me so very sad, it breaks me, It make me so mad! so fustrated, it drives me to work harder and pushes me to succeed but other times it just hurts and I feel like I am being stripped off my respect and self morth.

Its humiliating and degrading. Why can people be so harsh. I am a good person I know I have a good heart, shouldn't that be enough to ask for in a person? why can I not shake these negative comments? I feel such anger and shame in myself.

bluewave
xxoo

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Comments from the community:

Dear Bluewave

Sounds like you are in a bit of a difficult work environment - with all the shallow macho bravado of a bunch of emotionally inept ignoramuses.

Not the easiest environment to be in.

Here's what I'd do.

Work hard
Lead a balanced life
Don't fall into the trap of making work my life
Try to keep regular work hours (ie not too much unpaid overtime)
Try to enrol in some activities outside of working hours e.g. salsa dance class!
Maybe, commit to exercising 4 times a week - but make sure that you are doing it for YOU - to ENHANCE YOU - not cos of what any of those shallow materialistic tosspots say!

And finally, Take the high road.

You are worthy, and you know it deep down.

Also...remember...irrespective of what they say and do - you've got one thing that they haven't and that they want (don't kid yourself that they don't want it) - and NO ONE can take it away from you...the power of the P**sy....I've worked in male environments before...and all I can say is hold your head high, and remember - YOU ARE THE ONE WITH THE POWER.

Sending you strength, pride, empowerment and dignity.

Kimberly
xoxo

Written by Wolveress, 13. Jul 2007 03:14 AM

Bluewave

Welcome to depnet. Hope you find it beneficial and do the recovery program under my depression - very helpful.

As for the man environment you work in, good for you for being their and ignore the comments if you can as they are not good for your depression. You need to be positive which in this environment is difficult. Baby steps to help you with regards to the comments - throw comments back at them - that may stop them in their boots.

Go Bluewave!!!

Studying1

Written by studying1, 13. Jul 2007 06:36 PM

You are the youngest and only female bluwave, and as such believe me your weight is not an issue with them.
Why they are choosing to critisise you I don't know, but it's not your weight. Just sounds like a typical boys club..they make digs at each other like that..I don't know of you want to work there forever....Sounds like they are talking to you as they would talk with each other as males..so that's good if you are not giving off those helpless female vibes then you have come a long way.
Regards.

Written by Deleted_User, 13. Jul 2007 07:16 PM

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