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sober and better

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Written by bluewave 7. Feb 2007 03:34 AM

Hey guys,

thank you so much for your comments, I was feeling really low on that weekend. I'm not sure why I became so emotional, I am scared a bit about my drinking behaviour. My boyfriend has never made me drink, ever. However he drinks regularly, he does business deals with clients over a beer, drinks at the end of the week, drinks when he is happy, drinks when he is stressed...etc I am finding I too am drinking a lot more than usual, like 3-5 days a week and almost always get drunk. It's kinda weird, like it was so gradual, I didn't really notice until that night.

Also I didn't talk to my boyfriend for whole weekend. He messaged me heaps saying he was worried, and that he felt so stupid for leaving me behind and that he had to make it up to me. He was truely sorry and the fact that I didn't say anything to him about having a bad night makes me feel assured that he actually did take notice and once sober saw his obvious mistake. we talked on the monday after the weekend, I feel a lot better guys. I'm so happy at the moment. When I saw him I actually in the first time in my life said what I wanted to say. I didn't care if he disagreed or would like me less I told him he hurt me and that I was still kinda mad.

I am glad to also say that weekend I did not cut myself eventhough I really felt I needed it at that time. I realise I have become so much stronger than before. I also realised how much I love my boyfriend because he has helped me to love myself. i am not saying this to justify his behaviour that night. But every single day since being together he tells me that I'm beautiful or another equally nice compliment. Every single day. I am starting to believe in myself that maybe I am beautiful, maybe I don't need to loose weight, maybe he is right in saying my body is perfect for him and doesn't need to be changed. I feel like a stronger woman!

I feel I have been challenged and I have not resorted to all the negative behaviours I used to do. Still I need to do a lot more work on myself. But this is the first time in a long time that I can actually say that I am ver close to being happy! :)

bluewave
xxoo :)

I love you guys! take care!

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Comments from the community:

Dear bluewave

I loved reading your diary entry and found it so inspirational.

Firstly, you have recovered really well and quickly from your difficult experience on the weekend. Well done!

I am glad your boyfriend was truly sorry. He needed to be. Well done for saying exactly what you wanted to say, without worrying about his reaction. We all make mistakes, and many of us have been really pissed and behaved in ways that are not acceptable. The important thing is we learn from them. It is good that he seems to have learnt. It is good that you spoke your truth.

I understand how you feel about your boyfriend. My husband has also helped me to love myself, and I love him for this, and I also love him because he continually amazes me with his intelligent mind, his patience, integrity, and wisdom, his great humour, his compassionate heart etc. I could go on and on!! It is really great that your boyfriend loves you, and your relationship with him is helping you to heal.

Dear Bluewave you are doing really well. I am so happy for you and I thank you for giving me hope.

You know you need to look after yourself. If the alcohol consumption is becoming a problem you need to fix it. You'll be ok.

Lots of love

Kimberly
xoxo

Written by Deleted_User, 7. Feb 2007 07:53 AM

Don't measure your self worth by whether your relationship is ok or not. Though I am glad you feel happy. Keep doing the things you need to do for yourself. With drinking, always count your drinks, and buy your own also. If you have had 5 drinks, no matter how you feel, you are pissed. In between drinks you can have a soft drink (no-one will know) if it's gonna be a long night out.
Regards.

Written by Deleted_User, 7. Feb 2007 09:14 AM

Hi blue,

I am proud and pleased for you, you have realised that.

1) your drinking is too much, and getting drunk.
2) your bf loves you for how you are.
3) you told him exactly how you felt.
4) you did not cut, even though you wanted to.
5) you were challanged and used positive behaviours.

keep the positive going and we may not see you here for very much longer, which is what we all wish for and work toward.

good luck take care Marie

Written by 1990, 7. Feb 2007 04:16 PM