Flat
A page in the diary ""
Written by bluewave 2. Sep 2008 11:35 PM
Hey all,
thankyou for your comments yesterday I apologize for the intensity. I was trying to figure out what I was feeling and what I realized was I was hurt but more so I was actually angry.
I no longer feel very angry. I just feel tired. I want to sleep.
I guess everything is ok now, my past is no longer part of my life. I guess I am racked with guilt. I tried to talk to God but I can't, I don't deserve forgivness for my sins. I din't know...I think I'm giving up...I made mum cry yesterday because I burst into tears and she could not console me.
I see my psychologist on friday like every week. I'm just so tired of my mood swings, so is everyone else.
In a way I'm kinda glad my ex was mean to me because maybe it's karma getting back at me for making the wrong decision. I feel like I deserved it but it hurts still.
Sometimes i wonder what the hell is wrong with me, I think I'm just a self-pitying child. I hate it. I am sick of myself.
I don't deserve the things and people I have, I really don't
bluewave