Read diary

Comments from the community:

Hi Tazzy

CONGRATULATIONS, this is wonderful news.

I don't think we have ever met in the chat room, but I wanted to reply to this diary because it really hit home with me.

When I found out I was pregnant with my son, my husband was devestated, he didn't want children yet, and blamed me for basically tricking him into getting pregnant. That couldn't have been further from the truth, but I had never hidden the fact that I wanted children as soon as possible.

My whole life all I ever wanted to be was a mum. And here I was married, and pregnant and it should have been the happiest time of my life. But it wasn't. Except for my Grandma and one friend from highschool, the first thing every single person said to me when I told them about the pregnancy was "how is Phil taking the news?" or "it's a bit soon isn't it" or "shouldn't you have waited a while" or my personal favourite "poor phil, now he has a wife and a child to worry about!"

Here I was getting the one thing I had dreamed of my whole life, and nobody would share it with me. Nobody would share my joy or my excitement or even recognise that this should have been the single most ecstatic moment of my life. I was going to be a mum!

My ex-husband didn't even tell his family I was pregnant until I was 5 months, and his mother just got up and left the room.

I will never get that time back. I will never be pregnant for the first time again and I will never get to experience what all first time mums should experience. Please don't let this happen to you.

Tell your parents, who cares what they think or anyone else. If you want this baby and are excited about it, then let the world know. Revel in every single moment of being pregnant, read all the books, find out what is happening to you and your baby every week and every month. Do not let this experience or this moment be stolen from you by those around you. If they don't share your happiness - find people who do.

Ask your doctor or local child health nurse or midwife about any new mothers groups, often these start before the babies are born.

Join a pregnancy yoga or exercise class and meet other mums who can share this journey with you.

Take photo's of yourself and your growing tummy.

Write down your thoughts and feelings, all the names you think of and even the ones you decide not to use and why.

Keep every hospital tag and record. Photo copy your ultrasound pictures cause the originals will fade.

This is a wonderful miraculous occasion, and even if you have 10 more children it will never be as amazing and exciting as this first time.

Please, please don't let other peoples' opinions and comments and lack of support take this time away from you.

Write in your diary on here about everything that is happening, I would love to hear all about you and your new baby.

I am so happy for you. Reading your diary has really made my day. Bringing a new baby into the world is an amazing and beautiful journey and I would be so proud to be able to share yours with you.

Take care of yourself and your baby

lots of love and support

Bec

Written by Deleted_User, 12. Jan 2008 01:47 AM

Tazzy

Congrats. That is great news. I'm with bec - tell them and if they don't have anything nice or supportive to say then wipe them. Do keep the baby journal as bec has suggested of everything related to the birth. I am sorry your partner isn't being as supportive as you want him to - perhaps people have been talking to him and pressuring him about is it the right time for a baby when you are both not working. Ask him how he feels and then you should be able to work out if people have been talking to him or he is feeling joy or loss.

Go Tazzy!!!

Studying1

Written by studying1, 12. Jan 2008 03:53 AM

Congratulations! It's your life remember, and your baby, that's it.

Written by Deleted_User, 12. Jan 2008 07:17 AM

THANKYOU everyone for your comments, they have really made me feel much better!!!

to bec, i will be buying a digital camera over the next 2 weeks, even if its a cheaper one...lol and i will take your advice and get heaps of photo's of my growing tummy!

my fiance started rubbing my belly last night without even thinking so maybe its starting to sink in a bit and deep down he enjoys the fact that his child is growing in me. he may have just had a shock to start off with.

i will still wait to tell my parents but ill still try and enjoy everything in the meantime!

take care everyone and ill write again soon.
tazzy
xxxooo

Written by Tazzy17, 12. Jan 2008 10:08 AM

Hi Tazzy,
I agree with Bec 110%. I was 19 when I fell pregnant (not planned/not married) and it was a shock but my hubby (then boyfriend) and I had a good talk about it and decided that it was meant to be. The reason for this is that my dad had 4 precious years with his only grandchild before he passed away. It is hard telling people, because they seem to judge no matter what the circumstances are - even when we got married and had another son, people still asked us if it was planned.
Bec has hit the nail on the head - it is a precious time being pregnant - It was really special for me as I am adopted so my mum who could not have children was there the whole way - feeling kicks was just so special.
As Bec said, tell your parents and don't let their comments if they are bad affect you. This has happened for a reason, and your life will be filled with so much joy the minute your little baby is born. Just some advice but if you are pressured by your parents to get married, please don't. The hubby and I waited until our son was 10 months old before we got married, and honestly it was the best decision .
It gives us great joy now when people say what lovely boys we have - most of them are the ones that knocked us and said we wouldn't last - married 23 years this year.
Please keep us updated on how your are going, and I wish you all the best for your pregnancy.
Hope the food fetishes don't get too out of control lol
Take care and hope to chat with you soon
Lynne

Written by chookie67, 12. Jan 2008 06:22 PM