what to do?
A page in the diary "Tazzy's Diary"
Written by Tazzy17 22. Dec 2007 09:05 PM
woke up this morning feeling ok... don had to go out for an hour to help his brother. as soon as he left i broke down in tears. i feel so fat and useless. im trying to excersise as much as i can. hard when i cant go out anywhere due to my high lvls of anxiety.
i have started to watch what i eat, cut out un-necesary fats etc... but its hard, at least i had some healthy cereal for brekkie, i normally dont have anything...
had to endure the questions from my father last week about my life and my fiance... he still doesnt approve. ive been over this all before - and im trying to tell him to butt out, im 24 yrs old and ive been engaged for 2 years now, im not about to change for my father. especially for a father i rarely see... like once every 6 months if im lucky.
i see my fiance every day, and we love one another and are discussing having a child together. he has supported me when my even when my ENTIRE family deserted me (my mother literally walked out on me while i was in hospital and didnt return...) so if im going to love, trust and rely on somebody it will be my fiance more than anybody! certainly not my parents who left me to struggle with my problems, or my brother who left me when i needed him most.
my brother still wont speak to me after 2 years, ive never met his son (my nephew) and i guess i never will. over a fight i still dont know what's about - my mother apparently said something to him - and that stopped him speaking to me!
anyway - ill write more another day hopefully... i just had to get some things off my chest
tazzy