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was feeling positive

A page in the diary "Tazzy's Diary"
Written by Tazzy17 9. Nov 2005 09:57 AM

well i had my psych appointment today - she came to visit me at home because i really didnt feel like leaving the house today. shes a little worried that in relying on my relationship with don for my happiness... that im putting so much into it that ill end up hurting it.

apparently that a part or borderline personality disorder - so i have to find some other things in my life to be happy about and not put all the focus on my relationship with my fiance. thats gonna be so hard though. my relationship with my parents is very strained - theres a lot of conflict here at home and i need to get out.

a friend of my fiance's said i shouldnt spend so much time with him! well lets see... i cant got to his place to see him because his flat mate wont let me. he cant come and see me at home because of my parents... so i really dont get to see him all that much actually. i do the paper run with him on friday mornings because thats really one of the few times we can be together - despite the fact that hes busy working... oh well...

i just wish to god that people who dont know us well would just leave us alone. its none of there business anyway.

i was feeling positive about myself after my appointment with my psych - but then this "friend" was chatting to me on msn - and was basically telling me off for stuff that she has no idea about... shes not even really a friend of mone - more my fiance's friend - and his ex girlfriends!!! i kinda dont want anything to do with her anymore - she sticks her nose into other peoples business!

anyway, i better go have some food, and think about leaving this house to possibly get a hair cut cos i need it desperately! lol

seeya
tazzy
xoxoxo

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Comments from the community:

HI Tazzy...

Relationships are always a little bit of finding out what we can contribute. Why do people want to tell us what t do all the time? Don't they have energy just for being kind and being with you/us?

Do you have something that u really like doing? I have my singing..and the bike. I love getting out in the morning and going down a hill real fast!

What inspires u? Think of that...The best thing I did in my life was to start living independently.

Ciao

Bob

Written by chordsinger, 9. Nov 2005 06:53 PM

Hey Tazzy,

Your psych might have a point. I'm not having a go or trying to criticize you. I just know that in the past I have made the same mistake, of letting my relationship with a guy become the whole centre of my life. I was too dependent on the relationship for my happiness, where I should've had some other interests to keep me occupied and give me some joy.

I know you said you don't get to see Don as much as others think, but you need to use the time apart to be doing other things to make you happy. Do you have any hobbies, or play sorts? Even if it's just going for walks or go to the library or stuff like that. I know it can be easier said than done, but I hope you'll give it a try.

I hope I haven't upset you more with what I've said. I'm just trying to help. I hope you have some luck getting a house soon. Take care sweety. :)

Luv, ((hugz)) & smiles
Gidge
xoxox

Written by Gidge, 9. Nov 2005 08:31 PM