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Screwed up

A page in the diary "Jo's Learning Log"
Written by MissJ 20. Mar 2006 01:33 PM

Hi everyone,

I feel bad off-loading problems here today. It seems that there are many in need of positive vibes and support. SOme of you are doing it really tough, and to you guys I send all the support and love I can muster.

I feel terrible at the moment though. It is all crumbling around me, and I am trying to ignore it and do my best to keep going. I broke down yesterday, and I think it really shook Adam up becasue he was not expecting it. I am scared, and fel pretty alone. I am going to the psych today, but I don't know... does it ever end?

Back at work today and exceptionally tired. Not doing a lot, just trying to pass the time until hubby arrives and takes me to my appointment.

I am alone in the office, and I can feel the adrenaline rising. Very nervous, don't want to be here. Where do I want to be? Who knows, who knows. Don't want to sink back into this, but I am being sucked into a black hole. I am scrambling out, digging my nails in, fighting tooth and claw... but I don't feel I am winning.

Can't get my head straight enough to think right. Fuzzy thoughts, negativity, fear.

need to straighten my head and get some strategies together here, befor eit is too late and I lose too much of myself once more.

Jo

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Comments from the community:

Hey Jo,

Don't feel bad telling us what's wrong, that's what we're here for sweetheart.. There are alot of people needing support on here just lately but that doesn't mean that you don't..

I don't think there's much i can say to make you feel better, but don't give up, hang in there.. You have a gorgeous hubby and your whole life ahead of you..

So take care and keep that head up ok..

Love to you sweety..
Stace..xxx

Written by Anonymous, 20. Mar 2006 01:39 PM

Hi Jo
You are having a rough day!!
You know it will get better too, just keep trying to remember all the things you have done in the past that have made you feel well. Recall the steady , rhythmic breathing which makes your body relax.Let the light in.
Let go of your thoughts when you write on depnet, just as everyone else leaves them here, so can you.
Sometimes when I am having a bad time, I try to vent first and then end with a lighter note.I think we both like to be known as happy and positive people but it is unrealistic to be that way all the time.We are all just human.
You are always such a help to those who need a kind word.Remember that their is peace in giving and others here would just love to return a little of your loving kindness.So anytime you need us, we are here.

What do you use as a stress buster?
Exercise
Music
Massage
Calm breathing
Listing things you can be grateful for in the day
Pets
Partner!!
Laughter
Mindfulness - I have taken to this lately. It means really engrossing yourself in a task until it is complete without letting other thoughts distact you.

Please let us help you Jo, as you help all of us.
Love and Support
Sue:)

Written by dontworrybehappy, 21. Mar 2006 11:34 AM

Gee Jo, I hate to see you going thru this cos its desperate stuff with desperate feelings -I've been there too-can u not be alone -can u not reach out to a friend to be with you. We all need support ,please don't go thru this on your own -share it with someone close to you, a friend , who can support you and give you some comfort in your darkest times.It means reaching out -help can come from complete strangers.Share with them your plight and accept their comfort -wrap it around you like a protective cloak.
I'm sending Love now -wrap yourself in it also for it will protect & sustain you,you know me not but Love you will know for it is universal.

Written by Happyheart, 21. Mar 2006 06:33 PM

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