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Comments from the community:

O honey - I reely do feel for you as I know how isolated and stranded and hopeless you can feel. People don't seem to understand unless they too have experienced it, and it is unrealistic for us to expect them to, I suppose, although that doesn't make it any easier, does it.

If you need help, you need to find the right people and ask for the right thing. Maybe calling some emergency help, or lifeline is right for you. maybe having a serious talk with you psych or doc, or maybe even just a heart to heart with a good mate. Try and think about exactly what it is you need before talking to the person you choose. Do you need a big hug, a change in meds, or even a hospital stay?

I know it is hard to make decisions and define needs while we are in this state, but see if you can do it. Drop me and email anytime, I want to be here to support you.

Love, hugs and light
Jo

Written by MissJ, 18. Oct 2005 03:53 PM

hey em,
i hope things get easier for you soon, because it sounds like things are quite a struggle at the moment. sometimes getting the help you need can be there biggest struggle of all. i dont really know what else to say, apart from keep pushing at them. if you think you might need a hospital stay maybe see your gp and speak to them about it? because they have the ability to be able to put you in there. if you do see your gp tell her exactly how you feel. i know that i have a verbal contract with mine that if i get suicidal badly for a while and i loose it, that without any choice from me ill be put back in hospital. only because if it came to that i would refuse but when i think straight i know its the best place for me when im like that.

and the other day you said yourself you can beat this. i belive that just take everything one step at a time. dont do something to throw everything in your life away because of one or a few things that people have done to you. its not happening now. and you can choose from now how you want to live your life without interferance from them. and please dont take that in a harsh way, just trying to say dont end your life because of a bit of bad luck there are still many more brighter days for you.
love manda

Written by greenmartian, 18. Oct 2005 06:31 PM

hey jo and manda,

Thankyou so much for your reply's. You gave me the support when I needed it most, I will get through this, just got to keep pushing for help- it takes it out of you though- but i'll just have to keep pushing. I have another appt with the mental health team on thurday so hopefully I get more answers then, don't know.

love em

Written by esp, 18. Oct 2005 07:37 PM

Hi Em,

Sorry I haven't really been posting much on any of the entries but something drew me to make a comment on your entry I have been keeping up to date with what's going on just haven't made comments. Apologies for that. I have been having a pretty ordinary time myself lately. Firstly, I want you to know what an inspiration you have been to me since i joined this community. Your one very very special person. I am not sure what more you can do to get the help that you need but you know your fellow deppies are here if you need it. If your psych is the type that you can call when things get rough I am not sure what happens in your sessions but if they are anything like mine i go in with full intentiopn of saying whatever i want but it doesn't always work out then I suffer till the next one. Talk to your psych, they are there to help and if your allowed to call in between appts then call and have a chat. If it's not possible (like mine isn't) then get onto something like lifeline or a hospital it's better to get the help than harm yourself. your a very strong person and you can beat this...

I am thinking of you in your time of need, I am always here if you need anything.

Take care and much love
Kristy

Written by Anonymous, 18. Oct 2005 10:22 PM

Hi Kristy,
Thanks so much for your reply, in means the world to me. I'm so glad I have the support here and the support of friends. But I'm doing ok today,I've just gotto keep up the fight. which i'm finding difficult at the moment- but I'm determined not to let him win. Even though sometimes I feel like giving up- support- it's there i've just got to use it and not be afraid.
take care, love em

Written by esp, 19. Oct 2005 02:37 PM

Hi Em!

I was very, very happy to read you are doing OK Today! It sounds like you have been having a really rough time lately so that must have been a relief.

It is so frustrating to not be getting the help that you need. I was like that for quite some time too. My psychiatrist was only coming up with help that isn't suitable for Autistics.

I am sorry to hear that every moment is such a stuggle at the moment. That is really horrible!

Well, I wish I had something more useful to say to help you. I will just have to send you all my support instead! :)

Cheers,
Michael

Written by Anonymous, 19. Oct 2005 08:58 PM

Dear Em,
I feel for you sweety. I thought you were starting to become okay again but it saddens me to hear that you're not doing so great. I hope your appt tomorrow goes well - make sure you do get the help you need. Tell them you need more help.
You know we all care & love you here, I know that's not enough sometimes though. I wish I could do more to help you. I'm sending you extra ((((hugz)))) and love tonight & I'll say an extra special prayer for you tonight too. :)
Take care honey :)
Luv, ((hugz)) & smiles
Gidge
xoxox

Written by Gidge, 19. Oct 2005 11:21 PM